Resolution

I will make a list.  I will check it twice.  I will never get to it.  I hate changing, even for the better.  I will not think of the year collectively, because my stance on a year is how I feel in the present.  People see this as a turning point, but to me it is all continuous.  Everything will be the same tomorrow.  

I find this as an appropriate song for the new year.  The lyrics are phenomenal.  And although, I prefer the album version, this live performance is damn good.

BTW

This is such a beautiful song and video. The song meshes a Beirut beat: very exotic, yet comforting and welcoming; James Mercer's voice (I believe they're Swedish); and Kanye West's infatuation with diamonds (used as a metaphor, naturally). Great stuff.

How to get over yourself

1. You are not Holden Caulfield. And stop thinking you are the only one who relates to him.
2. As of right now, "Atlas" by Battles has been played 692,785 times on youtube. Unless you have no life, and have watched it that many times on youtube: other people listen to them. Get over it.
3. Stop thinking that the superficial morons you talk to are the only people that can listen to that music. They have no idea what they are talking about half the time and don't appreciate culture. Unless culture is a bong hit and an ecstasy tablet.
4. American Apparel is a ripoff. You buy 14 dollar plain shirts that shrink two sizes after they have been washed.
5. Take a walk alone. See nature.
6. Reminisce.
7. Regret.
8. Own up to the asshole you have made yourself into.
9. Become your own person (not to sound too Jeanelle Fu).
10. Repeat, if needed.

Trust

Trust has never been something I was good at.

Perhaps it has been the multitude of friends that have screwed me over. Was I naive to think that the next one were any different? Maybe it isn't even the fact they lied, but the circumstances. I have never been fond with the term "fake"; however, it seems I always befriend the fake kid. The one who talks shit about you behind your back and tries to cut you from their life, the one who makes promises to you they don't keep, and the one who is completely licentious and superficial. Whichever reason it may be- it leaves me high and dry; and colder and more distant for the next person that tries to reach out to me. It is fucking cruel. And it is fucking wrong.

Today I joked around that I will drive to the forest and practice witchcraft. As today progressed, I realized I was only partly joking; I really need to get the hell away from society. And by society, I mean Walnut.

I'm starting to hate everything about this place. But there are a few people that remind me that life moves on. And to them, I would like to say "Thank You" (which would be an understatement).

The Trunk

If there were any place I would want to be, it would be the trunk of my car. On a rainy day with nowhere to go, the small open space behind my two-seater welcomes me. I curl into the fetus position, and stare at the sky; with the rain silently dancing on the window. It is there I write stories, it is there I feel warm and dry, and it is there I can truly think.


I guess good things do come in small packages.

Night Crawler

My reactions to things are always the opposite of what they should be:

When I am happy, I am depressed.
When I am depressed, I am happy.

I now question loneliness: It's 9:30 and I am going 60 through Chino Hills Parkway.

I have never felt more comfortable in my life.

Fight or Flight pt.2

Fight or Flight?

This time I will fight till the bone, baby.

It absolutely will not happen again.

Note to Self: 11/25/07

• Read Still Life
• Finish history hw
• Get macbook off mind
• Run through neighborhood
• Finish Calc packet
• Finish velocity worksheet
• Finish Ferris Bueller for the fiftieth time.
• Start Spanish project on El Greco
• Wash darks
• Wash lights
• Wash towels
• Finish cleaning closet
• Mark up Crucible
• Mark up Catcher in the Rye
• Draw birthday card
• Start shopping for Secret Santa
• Re-cover APUSH book

Fill

I feel so soulless these days. I feel like something has been vacuumed out of my chest cavity, and that something is holding on to it.

I need something to feel. Some direct contact with someone. A slap. A kiss. A collision. I need some exchange of emotion with another person. Some inner revolution of youth, truth, and beauty.

Perhaps I shall stare in the sun. For even if I go blind, I will have had seconds-minutes, even- of pure ecstasy. I would have stared fate in the eye, and seen the world as it is. I could finally understand the environment around me; living in a state of tranquility and nirvana.

Two Weeks

I failed my driving test. Fuck this. Two fucking weeks.



What a load of bull.

Fight or Flight

I never realized how bipolar I get when I am anxious. One moment I am this chill guy and the next moment I am freaking out. Tomorrow I go for my license test. I need to do well. I need independence. To sum it up, I need a freaking car.

Gah, the pressure is intense. I am scared.

Momentum

It's all going downhill and we're on a one way ticket.


Change is bad.

A Town on a Hill

A pair of Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell today.

We stared at each others' eyes through the glass window of my door. Then I went to my room.

I was compelled to not answer my door: I am not comfortable with people telling me that the apocalypse is coming and that I am going to hell.

And isn't it all about perception? What one person considers sin is what another person considers sanctity.

I am Roman Catholic. I believe in God. Usually I do not show it in the best way, but in the end I do.

A lot of people believe that Catholics are freaks, but we honestly stay in our niche. And I hate the idea of convincing someone to believe. It sounds like lying more than trying to make someone truly believe in God. And who are you honestly doing that for? You are doing it for your own sanctity, not truly for the benefit of God.



I don't like talking about religion. I feel really awkward when I do.

I will never punch an old white woman...

It has been a long time since I have cried.

When I think about the next time I will cry, I always perceive that it will be painful. Not emotionally, but physically. The tears will drop down, squeezing from the tear ducts. Or instead of tears, blood will fall. I have constantly convinced myself the next time I cry it will be this dramatic.

I cried today. It did not hurt at all. It came about smoothly, and it was how I remembered it. It's as if just coming from the ocean. You feel this saltiness, but it tastes good. It's comforting. It helps make you change from being tense to relaxed. It is very euphoric.

I realized how naive I have been. That the next time a situation like that happened, I would be strong. I could handle it. I couldn't have been more wrong. I felt like a little kid again, afraid of a big monster walking around.

I know there are no monsters, but it is easy to make misconceptions.

Silence

I shout but nothing comes out.
I whisper but everyone can hear.

Have you fed the fish?

Today was not a good day. The phrase "not a good day" is actually an understatement. I have never truly felt so unhappy in one day. By third period, I just wanted to leave. Who was I kidding? It felt as if every person in the human population jabbed a knife into my kidney and left me for dead. When I ponder-it was mainly academic factors of why I hated today but still. In English, my teacher made a comment on my vocabulary which I found to be extremely harsh. Like, I have a decent vocabulary; and I am part of the anomaly of people who actually use SAT words in my mundane conversations. Then in Calc, I got a 78 percent on a test that I studied for four hours on. So I basically was kicked in the balls, and once it started to be relieved, someone else kicked me in the balls. Fifth period slightly took away my problems, but not completely. But still, that comment made me feel fucking humiliated. And how can she say I need help on vocabulary when I sit next to the kid who starts sentences on essays with "In conclusion," or the one across the room who doesn't even have subject-verb agreement down. Maybe I am in denial, but even so: three-quarters of the population could not tell you when to use his or her versus their. It is more necessary in life to no things such as when something is singular or plural, right? I don't know. Ugh.

Song

I need to blog, but I don't want to think. I would usually talk about something on my mind-but nothing is. This is what happens when I don't get a day of solitude. It seriously is an essential part of my life. And it pisses me off when people take advantage of it. My mom does this a great deal. On Saturday, she will stay home until like noon, and during this time I seriously just want and need to be alone. I seriously do not care who you are, I need silence to think. And even if you aren't making a noise-your presence is ear-shattering to me. So this is what caps everything up:

"The Sound of Silence"-Simon and Garfunkel

Staffers

ASDF nothing works anymore....

I am sick of incompetent staff writers. Nothing seems to get through they're small naive brains. I am sick of every time I give them constructive criticism, they cry or complain. Welcome to the world of journalism. Who said journalism was a fun easy-going world? It's cut-throat. I am so sick of babying. I have no time for this and now I have to write a copy and two modules. To top it off, I have no dominate for my volleyball spread; and the next two days I am having to spend nights romancing my history book and the Scarlet Letter. GAH! DOES ANYONE CARE?

Swarming

Writing, may it be story essays or blog entries, is a very difficult thing for me. I am not a bad writer, and I love to write. But my head is like Times Square, I have about 50 thoughts on one subject and it's difficult to see each one in its entirety. I am only able to skim the surface and can never dig deeper. Instead, I hit the thought and then hurry to the next-digressing as much as possible. As I go throughout my day, I always am thinking "how would I narrate this in a story?" or an even geekier "what am I going to talk about in my blog today?" But as I go through the day what was once my opinion on, say, evolution, is now about generational gaps. By the time I get to the computer I want people to see BOTH of these topics, but right as I click "new post", the topics weave together and none of the profound statements I had make sense. It's all just jargon.

In the spirit of digression, lord I hate writing about myself for school.

Hoppipolla

This morning I wanted to be a kid again. As I woke from bed at 5:40, I wanted to do things like a seven year old- treat each mundane task with excitement. As I took my shower, I let my imagination run wild. I scribbled my goals for the day, the name of my future love, and my name on the condensation of the glass. I went underneath the shower head and pretended to be under a waterfall in Africa. I took into account of every drop that came from the spout. When I brushed my teeth, I pretended the toothbrush was a monorail. When I dressed, I pretended I was dressing for some significant occasion. But their was no kidding myself. Today would be like all the rest. 0. 1. 3. 5. Nothing fresh. But a little shot of imagination every now and then can't hurt some one.

September

"The only people who are happy are the people who you don't know well."

True.




In other news, I am watching High School Musical 2 as a way to not be killed.

Ctrl+R (Refresh)

School starts tomorrow. I am depressed. I love learning-but how we convey learning makes me dread learning. I hate this routine way we teach, review, test. It just shouldn't be. But I will not let it get to me. I want to learn things, and I shouldn't bother myself with the burden of tests. But I will change everything I perceived myself as in sophomore and freshman year. This isn't a slump no more, it is a comeback.

Let me reintroduce myself:
My name is Michael.
I care what people think, and I am proud of it.
I can lift myself up.
I am constantly working harder to get myself out of Walnut.
I am not who you thought I was, or who I was yesterday.
This is the first day of the rest of my life.
I have reincarnated mentally and emotionally.
I am afraid because I don't know my future, but I am going to make it how I want it to be.
Let's push things forward. Let's deny the past. Let's refresh.

Random

We move fast convincing our selves we need to be somewhere on time (physically and mentally). In reality, we move fast so we don't have to think of a purpose for this destination.

180 Minutes (time flies)

As of 15:58, I have had the house to myself. I have 180 minutes of time of solitude before the my parents (the bane of my existence) come back from LAX with my relatives. During this time, my goal is to do as much disobeying as possible due to the bitch my dad was when he left. As of right now I am in safe mode for possible turn-arounds from parents. This mode ends until 16:10 and then I can enjoy sanity for a while.

Teenagers

This summer, was very static for me. No cultural epiphanies. No spiritual gains. Just a blank period of time. However, there was one thing that made my summer have a twinkle. That, my friends, is "Homecoming" by the Teenagers. I honestly don't know where to start. OK, lets begin with the video. The video gives off a "Virgin Suicides"-esque feel that was sponsored by what seems like American Apparel. In my opinion, the video hits that teenage feel right on target- with the fluffy rooms, the girls jumping on the beds and enjoying a pillow fight. It is practically MTV ready. Now to the song-the intro hooked me in somehow. The drunken down tempo which is slightly generic is given a distinguished feel. I even have an appreciation to the lyrics which so the point of view to both characters- and shows what the average teenage boy and girl are like. Thank you, the Teenagers.

The Fly

There is a fly in my room that is the size of a fucking cadillac escalade. It only seems to make noise when I am in deep thought. When I am running on my treadmill, there it is. While I am reading, there it is. WHEN I AM SLEEPING, THERE IT FUCKING IS! JFKDSJKSDLFJKLSDFJLKSD.
I want to sleep dammit! Fuck flies. Fuck each, individual, motherfucking maggot that will morph into a fly.



As you can tell, I am not a morning person. Well, a "have to wake up at one o' clock because of an obnoxious bug" person.

The Great Escape

I need to get out of Walnut. I hate living here so much. I hate everything about Walnut. It's filled with naive people who don't know what it is like to have a homeless man cuss you out for not saying bless you. People who don't know what drugs do to you. People who are attached to credit cards. Hell does not consist of minions, fire, and the traditional biblical description. Hell consists of track housing from the 70's and 80's, the village, mustangs, mercedes, and tutors. I can not stand this place. It is torture to make me live here.

Options

You are at the apex of your life. You can plan for the future but you don't have to stick to what you said yesterday. Today you may be an aspiring scientist. Tomorrow you are the next Tom Brokaw. There is no limitations. But grasp on to each moment of this period. Because soon you're never coming back.

Good luck.

16 Military Wives

this is how music videos were supposed to be made: witty and sophisticated.

Repaso

0. Calc AB/AP-Hildreth
1. English 3 H-Donee
2. Pubs- Chai
3. APUSH-Nelson
4. Spanish 3 H- De la Cruz
5. Peer Counseling-Johannsen

beautiful!

What???

I am LOL-ing right now that my school forces us to read and analyze a book that starred Alan Arkin as the main character.

Registration

I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!! I WANT MY SCHEDULE!!!

Ahead

"When there is nothing left to burn you must set yourself on fire."

Veterans

So I was at work today and a man came in and he wore a shirt saying "VIETNAM veteran" with an American flag, an old hat stating his division and pins with other veteran paraphernalia, and one of those ubiquitous "Livestrong" bracelets but instead saying "I support our troops". As I thought about this, I questioned: what does this guy expect from doing this? Does he think citizens of America will start to run to him and hug him and worship him? And I mean, why should we "respect" Vietnam vets? I mean, they weren't fighting for freedom. They were fighting for paranoid MaCarthiests (sp?) who were obsessed with the Domino Effect. The people fighting there didn't volunteer either. They either went to Vietnam. Or they went to prison. I don't understand this whole thing. It just doesn't make sense to me.

Scanning

I want to be cool.






Angela Wu is cool. Yeah, I want to be as cool as her.



[other crap: camera is charging so pics tomorrow]

A Bit 'O Grass Stains

Does not a ruined pair of jeans make.


Setting:Hollywood Bowl
Cast: Band of Horses, Andrew Bird, the Decemberists, my sister, my mom, 13,847 people, and me.

We finally arrive after lots and lots of traffic. I thought I bought really crappy seats but they were actually really decent.

It started with Band of Horses. Then Andrew Bird played. He was amazing, but kept twitching cuz he had uber amounts of energy. I thought he would explode and I was like "you can't die! you're too amazing!". My sister fell in love with him.

After Andrew Bird, my sister and I went to buy shirts and as I am walking I run into the singer to Band of Horses! But I didn't want to be lame and ask for a picture so I just kept walking nonchalantly.

Then the moment 13,800 people were waiting for: the decemberists with the LA philharmonic! It was a spectacle. Colin Meloy had so much energy and his guitar broke so the roadie was fixing it and he ran around the stage.

Pictures tomorrow.

Admired Nonchalance

There is something about this summer that is so -_-. Last summer was so defining. It helped provoke spiritual thought in me and gave me a better perspective of society. I understood our parents and saw how they were just like us, and how they try to deny it. This summer I feel like such a philistine. I'm freaking out about stupid things of the future. I am always worrying. I am focusing only on school. I have no sense in anything. I am just in this SAT/Permit world. I am tired. I am nauseous. I am committing.


I am growing up.

AS to the DF!

On a lighter note: it has been forever since I tagged a blog as ASDF! GO MICHAEL!

Suzanne FUCKING Middle School

There is something about this, this, hellhole that I can't help but hate. How does this place make kids such pompous douchebags? I hate the PMS teachers who cry when a kid asks the same question twice. I hate the principal who makes kids say the Pledge of Allegiance with her. I hate that douche VP. I hate the stupid auditorium and its stupid half gangsta/half whatever murals located around school. Every time I think about that prison I want to vomit. QUE ASCO!

Electioneering

If Rudy Giuliani is voted president, I am leaving the country that day. He has even been dubbed "worse than Bush". IMO, Bloomberg is the best choice, but I doubt he will get anywhere even if he decides to register independent.

"Think she's trying to get the Mafia vote? I think most of them have lost the right to vote. I hope."
-Rudy Giuliani

Oh lord, please America don't vote for him!

The Secret Machines

Way, way back in a year 2004, a band known as The Secret Machines released an album called "Now Here is Nowhere". Although when I first heard this album I thought it was crap, I have come to realize that they were one of the most underrated and neglected "upcoming" bands of the 2000's. With my favorite song, "Nowhere Again", the song tells the story of the post-9/11 twentysomethings and how the love and peace their parents were taught were completely lost when singer Brandon Curtis opens with the lines "Cellophane flowers never happened for me/I've been sleeping the day off". The entire song keeps you interested and ends in such a grandiose manner with the drums,keyboards, and guitar. Even the video is great eye candy, the lyrics are flashed in braille in the background.

Synchronize

Everything is so much better when it is synchronized with nature.

Humans need to synchronize with nature.

Eagle vs. Shark

As I surfed around the blogosphere this morning, I came across the trailer to a movie coming out called "Eagle vs. Shark". And first and foremost, I would like to say this is basically just a carbon copy of Napoleon Dynamite in every way possible; however, there are two reasons why I really actually want to see this movie:
1. The soundtrack: The music is composed by a band called The Pheonix Foundation. While I listened to the preview, the first thing that struck into my mind was how great the voice was and how it brought back the sounds of Jesus and Mary Chains' and the Stone Roses' unique
shoegazing sound that is so epic and relaxing at the same time.
2. The poster: I can't help but love the poster. The quirkiness of the costumes and the color just makes me want to see this! I mean, it's so cute! (yes, I just said it was cute).

Pool Party

I'm going to a pool party for three year olds today.

That means I am going to a party that is directed toward swimming, to a demographic of people that hate the water with a passion.

I don't get it.

Maycomb

So as I was pondering about my decision if I was right dropping out of IB, I began to think what was more important: being a very social person or a very academic person.

As having both is the obvious necessity, I would honestly say as high school students, we should focus more on the latter.

For as a teenager, it is quite easy to build relationships with your peers and even if you are going to leave them after senior year, you will have the confidence to meet new people and take on being a little fish in a big bowl.
You could always pick up these skills as you grow up. However, if you were to try and learn how to be a more social person later in life, it will be much more difficult. This is the opposite for academics because you learn more and more throughout your life.

Also, after you get through that portal of hell known as school, without having social skills, the academic advantage would be totally useless.

And take it from my 8th grade English teacher, who would always tell me "The world is run by C students."

Do-Op

Mucho libros tengo que leer.

AHCK I must keep in tact my Spanish! I'm already forgetting some grammar concepts!

I love Almost Famous
"Never take it seriously, you never get hurt. Never get hurt, you can always have fun. And if you ever get lonely, you just go to the record store and visit all your friends. "

&&& I love I Heart Huckabees
"How come we only ask ourselves the really big questions when something bad happens?"

I WANT TO WATCH THE "I LOVE THE..." SERIES!!! NOW!!!

Buyer Beware!

For some reason the phrase "caveat emptor" is stuck in my head. I keep repeating it over and over.



Damn vocab!

He Revenged

arcadepostcards (8:58:12 PM): mrs diragle*

PP3A (8:58:31 PM): HAHAH

PP3A (8:58:35 PM): oh did i tell u what i did

PP3A (8:58:37 PM): ok so

PP3A (8:58:38 PM): once

PP3A (8:58:41 PM): i was bored

PP3A (8:58:46 PM): and i really wanted to try

PP3A (8:58:51 PM): this thing rosie does

PP3A (8:58:57 PM): where instead of gluing her collages

PP3A (8:58:59 PM): she sews it

PP3A (8:59:08 PM): so i got all the referrals mrs diragle gave mne

PP3A (8:59:10 PM): well not all

PP3A (8:59:12 PM): just like 5

PP3A (8:59:15 PM): and then sewed it

PP3A (8:59:19 PM): so then i was liek hmm

PP3A (8:59:21 PM): missing something

PP3A (8:59:28 PM): then i got my 6th grade picture

PP3A (8:59:30 PM): sewed that

PP3A (8:59:32 PM): and i was like

PP3A (8:59:36 PM): IT IS MISSING SOMETHIGN!

PP3A (8:59:42 PM): so then i got black crayon

PP3A (8:59:47 PM): and in capital letters over it all

PP3A (8:59:49 PM): i put

PP3A (8:59:52 PM): HAVE A GREAT SUMMER

PP3A (8:59:58 PM): and yesterday i slipped it under her door

VIVA LA MEXICO!!!

how do Spanish teachers sleep at night?

This American Life

I don't get it.
Why would anyone want to live an American life. It's just a land where everything is so fucking generic. The anti-conformists all conform to to look anti-conforming. Heck, me just saying that last sentence was hella cliche. It seems like nothing is new. No one wants to go beyond a box, or they believe they are when they aren't. And I hate how college is used as such fucking propaganda. Isn't is basically just a brainwashing machine? I mean, you need to go to Good College and you need to have Good Grades, and do all of these lame propagandist clubs to get in.
So fucking robotic.
The life of the American is this:
1. grow up in townsville, usa
2. go to a college, get piss drunk
3. live in the city for a bit
4. move to a nazi suburb where tweakers hold signs advertising homes divided by walls higher than the Great Wall of China.
5. lose all sense of culture you once had.
6. learn to love your corrupt government.
7. x_x

That is basically every American in the world. You go from being YOU, person of anything: a malleable soul. you could become anything: an artist, teacher, fireman, stripper, a drag queen, whatever it may be. But you are deficient in motivation: you settle for applying a white collar and being America.

What are you: YOU or America?

The Guerilla Poetics Project

Today I went and got the books I need for summer reading. As I was flipping through The Heart is a Lonely Hunter I came across this small green paper and on it was a poem called "Bring Me" by Adrian Manning.

a screaming bird
a burning horse
or a squealing pig
something to shock
the day into being
something to sharpen
the hours
bring me some steel
hone it for me
put it in my hand
something to slice
off the excess
bring me anything
searing heat
piercing cold
to shake
the vacuous
moment
bring it to me
but promise me this
when you leave
don't take it
away

I actually find it really good. On the back, it had an analysis of the poem and then it had a link to a website, www.guerillapoeticsproject.org. So when I got home I went there and there organization is amazing!

They get all these small known, really good poets and the create these little cards. Then the poets and "operatives" sneak them into books in libraries and bookstores all around the states and the UK. It's honestly one of the coolest things I've ever seen/heard of.

10

These are the 10 commandments after the 10 commandments:

1. Thou shall not wear a goatee.
2. Thou shall not complain when one gets higher than a C on a test.
3. Thou shalt always be prepared.
4. Thou shalt get what they want.
5. Thou shalt memorize ones SAT vocab.
6. Thou shalt not obsess over nike dunks, no matter how flamboyant they are (unless one is Kelly).
7. Thou shalt play word association weekly.
8. Thou shall not use the term "fake" in any situation dealing with human emotions.
9. Thou shalt avoid awkward situations.
10. Thou shalt think about the future and not college.

Haircuts

I love when my hair is not too short but not too long. It's like the best part of a relationship.


In other news I really want to move to Canada right now.

Lloyd, I'm Ready to be Heartbroken

I remember at the end of last summer when I was in Italy until school started, I would listen to this song a lot. It's funny how some events can make songs really sentimental to you. Even now that rush comes when I hear this song. To sum it up: it's perfect.

Answers

Was it a waste or did it all pay off?




It most DEFINATELY, paid off.

:)

"I'm not angry at you"

I have heard this phrase 3 times today and it is getting to the point where I am going to go insane.

If you aren't mad why are you acting the way you are?

If you aren't mad why are you putting on these games?

If you aren't mad why are you involving me just because I am the Belgium of this?

Naive Melody

I was lacking the ability to shut up today.

I tend to do that when I am anxious.

The only thing I will be able to remember from people of the class of 2009:

"Don't step on my shoes, I just bought them at the dunk exchange for 300 dollars"

May 2007

Is just one, gigantic clusterfuck.

I'm From Barcelona

Wouldn't life be so much easier if we all just formed 29 piece bands that traveled around and had fun?

Best Cheesy Cliche Flirting Line Ever!

"Is that an umbrella or are you just happy to see me?"

Stop Shaking

Well today two good things happened from my goals list so I VERY happy today.

In Spanish we had to make a poem about a food/drink and here is what I created [translated]
Ode to Milk
The milk bursts from a cow
A farmer collects it
then he sells it to the community
Children drink it
and grow
grow
grow
the cup that is very white
makes the children smile
they kiss it
Thank you, cows.


lol. good stuff created in five minutes.

Cut Your Hair

ahh i love this song so much!

Little Children

I feel pathetic when a 7th grader gets double the comments on myspace than I get. Than again I pity people who get double the comments on myspace than I get. And it disturbs me when I see their names and it's things like "Victoria is SOOOO much sexier than Emily"and are flashing gang signs and slutting it up at Medieval Times. Were we this naive in middle school? Probably.


I also saw a sixth grader walking home from school talking on a RAZR.


I didn't have a phone until eighth grade. And Saturday I just got a new phone that is RAZR-like.

This weekend I have been listening to a lot of Pink Floyd. Weird.

"How I wish, how I wish you were here, We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year"

Me gusta!

Chicago Seemed Tired Last Night

Happy Birthday Catherine!


You ditched coming down Sunday. And you got to see the decemberists.


You suck.


Anways, I am overwhelmed with the amounts of cr4p going on. I got a 70% on my Julius Caesar test. I will drop it and ignore the fact I ever read it.

Compilations

This year has been so hard on me.





I can't wait for yearbook distribustion party to come, then it can fimally mark the end of a mess of 180 days compiled together, marking each mistake I made.


But there is 10 weeks, 10 weeks to regather myself and remember life, then another 180 days to make me remember I can't memorize things for sh1t.

And it all repeats.

Surfing on a Rocket

This weekend had its highs and lows.
Highs:
Being able to finish Antigone in an hour
Skipping work (stupid hick emplyees are gross)
Driving

Lows:
Missing the IB art show which looked very fun
Skipping work (one extra week till mac book)
no new cell phone

ONE MORE WEEK OF STAR TESTING!!!

The Ghost of Caesar

Just as I thought that idiot Julius Caesar was out of my life he comes back in the form of a test. Ugh.

I actually have a B in Chalew. I am extremely shocked.

&

I am a hater.

&

I don't know what else to say. I am not very interesting today.

Meeting People is Easy

I just came back from Denver and it was muy fun. My roommate was boring but oh well. Yearbook won Pacemaker AND placed first in best of show and that was sooo cool. Here are some pics:

Black Horse and the Cherry Tree

It's about midnight and we just left Manfredonia for pizza and a walk in the market. It's my cousin, his friend, my sister and me. I was told we were going to a party but then again I had no idea what anyone was saying. We then go to a parlour and get some gelato. We get into the red car and we hit the freeway. My cousin's friend begins to go 100 mph and on his mixtape is playing "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree" by KT Tunstall. The rush was like drinking 5 gallons of coffee and there were no thoughts about anything. It didn't matter the destination or anything. We had nothing better to do (well, my sister and I, Antonio had to work). We didn't even speak the same languages, but we knew what we were all thinking and saying. Then my cousin's friend stops the car, and we're on the beach. We all take off our shoes and it's pitch black but you can feel the wind and hear the waves crashing on the coast. We all go up to the water and kick and splash and relax for 10 minutes. Then we go back into the car.


For some reason I keep thinking about this moment. It's just so perfect.

I Still Remember

Today was better than I thought it would be.

My sister commanded me to get a flickr account and I seriously am in love with it. Screw photobucket and imagesack. They're nothing like those two.

The University of Dallas is weirdly in love with me. But I would never go there.

My sister's friend Julie came down from San Francisco with her and she was really cool. She's from Missouri and she asked where I wanted to go to college and I told her Northwestern and then she was telling me all these cool things about it and now I want to go there even more.

35$ in gift certificates, chocolate, and the White Album. I love Easter.
(presents compensate for the asdf factor of holidays)

Sushi

Is so good.


Holidays are so asdf.

Jenny Le

I am writing a blog for you.
Because I greet you with either a high pitched voice or a death metal scream.
Because of that red head bitch.
Because you questioned me why I did not mention you in my blog.

So this is your blog.

Don't Listen to the Static

Long time, no blog.

This means that this will be a long blog.

I watched the series finale of Six Feet Under and it was amazing and soooo depressing. I wish it was still on now. Also I went to my sister's and she just got this huge new computer and it was sooo cool.

Also Denver is next week and I can't wait!

Also, also Ms. Miraglia DOES care about people! Thank you.

I am listening to this new bloc remix and its incredible. It makes this song 78938973 times better.

Speaking of bloc, I realized the song "Vision of Heaven" is one of the best songs ever made.

&&& Angela is muy cool for spelling my name right. On the first try too!

I need to make cool blogs, but I have a lack of motivation, AND I AM BACK IN BLOGDOM MANDY


IN OTHER NEWS: I AM FINISHED WITH JULIUS FREAKING CAESAR!!!

Oh no! Oh my!

OH NO! THE CALC AB/AP PLACEMENT TEST IS TOMORROW! OH MY! AMEOBA IS THE BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD!

Awkward...

I feel like I am in an awkward situation almost everyday and it is getting annoying. I wish I could have a clone of me for every awkward situation I get myself into cuz it's sooo awkward being awkward.

Jargon

Open house was tonight but I decided not to go cuz IDK. I have the same exact grade in spanish. And I took track and field photos today. Sorry, Angela if you are reading this, they are crap. I am a little rusty with the camera since I haven't taken sports photos since January and yeah. I am very glad tomorrow is a minimum day so yes!!!!

A Mirror Factory

I seriously need to get it together. Now! Everything is slowly falling apart I really need to pick up the pieces. I wish I could repeat this year all over again and fix the mistakes I made. But I can't and I have to suffer the decisions and the failure that happened to me. My grade in English is probably like a D since I got a zero on the mini-final (even though I shouldn't have gotten a zero). I have no idea how I will fix everything but I know I'm going to have to find out soon.

I realize most of my blogs are labled asdf. haha.

ASDF

Asdf.

So much is going on in my head now.

I realized it will soon be time for org tryouts and I am seriously scared about it. I really want to make PC but I have high doubts in a way. Oh well.

Sometimes I feel like I am an animal and someone puts a collar on me and then puts in the collar a twig with a string attached with some food on it. It feels that no matter how hard I work, I will never seem to reach that "A", or that promotion, or that acceptance to PC, or whatever it may be. I seriously try harder than most of the kids in my Chem class yet I get C's and B's on tests. Sometimes I wish grades were based on effort. Better yet, I wish grades didn't exist. Then maybe a student would actually want to learn a damn thing in there life. But putting this pressure on a student is ridiculous. It doesn't help for the future at all, and even if; it doesn't matter about what you know just who know. Think about anyone who is famous. They had connections not good grades. Ugh. I am going to start my Julius Caesar paragraph that even though I will probably work 3 hours on I will only get at most a B-.

Water&Fire

Here is my weekly hot/not list:
Hot:
1. Menomena's "Wet and Rusting"
2. P-Ho.
3. CD-RW's
4. Macbooks (I wish I had one)
5. Postal Service's "Brand New Colony"

Not:
1. Ms. Arreola
2. Multi-cultural show
3. CL
4. pop-ups
5. Julius Caesar

These are the fruits and banes of my life as of the week of 3/17/07.

It's Gettin' Harder

Did you ever have the worst week ever?
Did you ever have the hangover to the worst week ever?
It's worse than the worst week ever. It has all the bad crap from the week before and now additional crap. Ugh.

In other news I was kicked off the softball field cuz I almost touched the ball. Geez base/softball is so retarded. Why should it still be in play if it is out? IDK. Then this bitch next to me and Jenny was having a field day about it and bitching about it. No one seemed to let it go. Not even when we left. Ugh. And the heat was a mother. Jenny is interesting.

My throat hurts. And nothing seems to be helping. And the fact we have no water in my house doesn't help.

I seriously hate the research project. And I convinced myself that I hate my job. And I hate all the workers. They're hicks.

And I know exactly who to blame this on. Since I am co-president of the IHC club.

There was something I was going to add but I can't seem to remember.

LALALALALA!!!!

I really want to take pictures at suzanne park. there is just something bizarre about that park which makes me want to. I have to take my first driver's ed. course and i am not looking forward to it. I think I will just slack off and be rebelious since it is a waste of time and I already have my pink slip.

Nausea

I feel nauseous.
Everything is spinning.


I can't analyze Shakespeare. I can barely translate Shakespeare.


And what's worse is I think I got a zero on my vocab mini-final for having my head turned around. I spent an hour preparing for that test for literally nothing? That is not going to happen. Well, I shall find out tomorrow.


I wasn't able to get my permit 'cuz triple gay doesn't want to give me my proof of registration.


Why do teacher's throw all this stuff at you all at once?

And who thought of pop-ups? And the inability to download firefox/mozilla? Answer: Bill Gates.

MATH&ENGLISH&SPANISH...ew. I hate Ms. Arreola. I hate talking about school. I wish I could just be some uneducated hick.

The Once and Past King

William Shakespeare is the bane of my existance. All he is, is a GPA dropper. Thank you Mr. Shakespeare, THANK YOU!!!!!!!!

Ugh I hate short blogs.

I will make longer one's when I have an interesting life.

The Yesteryears

I just found out that my mom knew more about my old friends than I did when I hung out with them.

Keep Fishing Pt. 2

PLEASE SOMEBODY TEACH ME HOW TO DOWNLOAD WINDOWS SERVICE PACK 2!!!!!!!

Keep Fishing

Babel is a good movie.
And Bowie is a good singer.
And the Arcade Fire is a good band.
And Scrubs is a good tv show.

I am doing hxc studying for the next chem test which doesn't even have a chosen date yet.
Also I believe libraries and the DMV are stuck in time and will never leave 1986.
Permit test Tuesday OMG!!!!

Sad Thursday

So Ms. Tan is pregnant. But it means she's stepping down as adviser :[
It's so depressing.


I don't know what to say.

Attempting to Fill the Holes In My Brain...

I have:
A chem test
A Spanish grammar test
A rough draft
due tomorrow

I feel: 3% prepared
Do I hate writing news articles? Yes. Why? Because I get the retarticles.

I also have 100% decided IB isn't and never will be worth "it".

In other news: I made a second grader cry today

In other news of the other news: "Why don't you sell your vodka?"
"Pssht...I'm not going to sell my stash."

LOL!!! ROFLCOPTER!!!

My eyes!

I hate allergies. Long story short I can't see and I am producing water from my nostrils. Did you want to know this? No. Is it important? Yes. Chem test on Thursday. Como se dice "intense"? In other news of the other news I MUST get the new Arcade Fire cd ASAP!!!.

Cicero

Somewhere William Shakespeare is laughing in his grave thinking of how many high school students he's pissed off. Hope you like fire, Mr. Shakespeare.

Surpsise?

It is 2:00 and Robin wasn't supposed to be there until 3:45.
I knock on the door, Robin's mom opens it.
"Surprise!!!!-wait, it's just Michael."
I am quickly traded my present for a mask.
30 seconds later, Robin knocks on the door.
"Surprise"
Robins reaction: fake.


Sorry for ruining your surprise party Robin. Next time I will come 30 minutes before supposed to.

Uh-oh

Well xanga is too fobby, and livejournal is too sc3n3; so I will use this.